Apparently you CAN be too thin.....

Sorry I've been absent. Was in Schaumburg Illinois all last week and busy, busy, busy with the conference.

So anyway. Today I was back in therapy for my torn ab wall muscle (or so we think). And the therapist stops in the middle of her deeep myofacial massage in my belly area and says 'what is that'? I'm like.... uh..... i dunno......
turns out not everyone has a super strong pulse in their abdomen (who knew?) and coupled with the mystery pain that could be displaced groin pain..... she needed to alert my doctor because that pulse could have been an abdominal aortic aneurysm..... WTF?!?!?!

She calls the doc who says I should get an abdominal ultrasound.... they got me in today a) because I work at the hospital and b) the coordinator said whenever they hear the words aneurysm, deep vein thrombosis and the like, they make a point to get you in...... aye aye aye....

the ultrasound tech and the attending doctor were extremely thorough and could feel the pulse through the ultrasound instrument..... turns out my aorta is perfectly fine and although it's pulsing super strong, there's no dilation and so nothing to worry about. just need to watch it in case it gets stronger. they checked ALL my organs and said I'm ideal to scan because everything shows up so nicely because I have so little fat.

the doctor... a new one from the philippines who is tiny herself admitted that she too has  a strong abdominal pulse and that mine is showing so strong because I'm so thin and only have a thin layer of fat and tissue covering the aorta.

Who woulda thunk it?!?!?! So MUCH relief that there's not a huge medical problem and glad the physiotherapist reacted the way she did because I'd rather have that then the alternative.

And now that I've given you my Halloween scare, I leave you with a few pics from Saturday night's Halloween dress up. I was Hoochie the Clown. - so much fun shopping for a costume when you're this size!!!!!

I had to add black leggings.... there was NO way I was traipsing around
with my derriere hanging out of the leotard and tutu!

Just noticing my breast bone is now as prominent as my collar bones....
need to get a bit of an unfill so I can stop this weight loss.... who
ever would have thought *I* would be saying that!!?!?!

I have Abs. I have proof.

Not sure if I've blogged about this, but some of you know I was suffering from a weird hip pain even when we were in Chicago. It's been about 2 months since it first came on. A month ago I broke down and went to an osteo and he said it looked like trochanteric bursitis. He prescribed rest and Arcoxia (more on that in a bit).
I rested. And I rested. Then after 2 weeks I went back to boot camp and ended up being in excruciating pain for a day and a half. Since then, the pain seems to be progressing to the point where even just daily walking about hurts.

So I decided to go ahead and get the cortisone shot which is the next step in treatment if rest and meds don't work.

Well that doc is off island until October 31st so I managed to weasel my way into another, figuring I'd sweet talk him into giving me the shot and I'd be on my merry way.

He didn't think it was the bursitis.... the spot I'm now definitely feeling the pain in is too high up. He thought it might be the muscles around the hip flexor being too tight and sent me to a physiotherapist for an evaluation and pilates style stretching.

I met with her today and after a lot of pushing, poking, pulling and prodding, determined that there is absolutely nothing wrong with my hips. amazing flexibility and range of motion and the ball is gliding effortlessly in the socket.

Her diagnosis - a torn abdominal wall muscle of all things!!!!!!!!

But makes sense when I told her I feel pain when I sneeze and when I do push ups or burpees.

She says we've been doing all the right treatments, just in the wrong place!!!!

So the orders are more rest (no running, no pushups, nothing, basically, that engages my lower abdominals). Ice 1 or 2x a day and ultrasound while in an extreme ab stretch position involving a stability ball.

I cracked up when she said it was abs, because I always swear at bootcamp that 'i ain't gat no abs'. well, she said, 'clearly you do, because you've torn one!

She seems to think I'll be ok to run the half marathon in February, it will just be a matter of whether or not I can actually train for it.... because as we all know, I am NOT a RUNNER!!!

On the matter of arcoxia.... it's a pain killer and anti-inflammatory. She asked how that was going down.... I said it's been iffy because my stomach has been very irritated of late..... she seems to think the arcoxia could be the culprit because she says it tends to be very abrasive on the stomach..... She gave me some excellent advice that I pass on to all of you..... she said whenever another doctor prescribes anything, I should consult with my lapband surgeon before even getting the prescription filled because he may want to change it or prescribe something I can take along with it to ease the irritation..... she said other docs prescribe assuming a normal physiology, but I no longer have that. Mine has been compromised.

Word to the wise.

Deep Thoughts

I still have more Chicago photos and memories to post, but as I said, I'm dragging them out so that every so often you all get a pleasant surprise and a chance to reminisce.

I do have a more serious topic I promised myself I'd blog about following Chicago.

****disclaimer -- this is NOT intended as a judgment of ANYONE. Just my personal thoughts on a topic that interested me.


If you've read my blog from the start, you know that before my surgery, I told very few people about my decision to have surgical intervention. I had done my research. I was satisfied that this was the right choice for me. I didn't want to deal with negative comments from people who didn't really know what they were talking about at that point.

The night of my surgery, I outed myself on Facebook.

I've not once had a negative comment from a friend, family member or a stranger about my decision. I am on a local lapband commercial and in advertisements and strangers stop me to congratulate me and ask questions, but never to judge me.

I guess that's why I was fascinated to learn that so many of the wonderful women I spent time with this weekend are in the closet about their decision to get a lapband.

I realise that there are a million different reasons for telling or not telling. I was just surprised to realise that it seemed I was in the minority.

I am so free about my life and my experience that I guess it would seem to me like a helluva heavy burden to carry around such a big secret.

Also, I get SUCH a high out of talking to morbidly obese women about the surgery and my life with the lapband. Every time I do, I feel like maybe, just maybe, I've helped to make a little difference in their lives.

It really hit home on the weekend when I got a message on FB from a primary school classmate. He is now considering getting lapband and reached out to me for my thoughts and answers to those burning questions. I gave him my blog url and am hoping he's reading mine and finding many others.

I guess if anyone's in the closet because they're afraid of what other people will think or say, I think you might just be surprised. People have told me they're proud. They think I'm brave. They now consider me a role model. But not once have they said something cruel.

BOOBS part 2 of however many it takes....

 Here's part 2. I was holding out in part because I wanted to keep the reminiscing going and going and going and give you lovelies something to brighten up your weekend.
Also because I can't access blogs from the office and every day forgot to bring my laptop home!
Had a great day Friday shopping and sightseeing along Miracle Mile with Angela, Fluffy and Stacey - was introduced to the incredible Charming Charlies accessory store by the Dallas contingent.
I *think* this was the day I inhaled a molten chocolate cake at Grand Luxe.... the days and desserts are now all a blur.
It may also have been the day I bought the pink argyle socks that represent my (foolish?) decision to join Angela and Fluffy in the Disney Princess Half Marathon in February!!!!
I'll let the rest of the evening be told as they usually are best - in pictures!

I love this photo of Angela and Stacey being tourists as I was being paparazzi

It was like my heros were transformed into 3D
The lovely Karin and Angela

At Pizzeria Uno on Friday night with Karin and Angela

Can't believe how close Stephanie and I live. Well kinda. 

My roomie for the weekend Stacey

I love that Joey scored Boobs wine for all of us. Apparently
Angela felt the same way!

The Friday night meet n greet was WILD. so many
absolutely incredible women
all with incredible stories to share

In the way background, I think it's Stephanie playing paparazzi.
Then in middle, Angela chats with Dawnya and the anonymous Fluffy.
Such a shame I can't show her face because she's Beauyooooooteeeeeful!
And up front we have Krystal on the left and Read

Angie and Barb, Thelma and Louise

Add caption

More beautiful ladies. Jenn and Amanda

The weekend planners scored amazing stuff for goodie bags
and even had a dreyload of prizes. I won a filtered water
bottle. More on that in a later post

Stephanie, Draz, Joey and Linda
part of the planners extraordinaire team

Barb models her basket from Stephanie's company
http://www.joyful-gift-baskets.com/

Oh to be able to read Krystal's mind right about now.
Ronnie (in purple dress), Stacey and Angela

Draz lends an air of drama to the evening

Two band rockstars - in real life. in the same picture!
Nicole and the absolutely delightful in person
as she is in her blog Catherine

Jen and Angie

Barb gets a "special" gift. You figure it out yet Barb>

Stephanie was on top of things with all the housekeeping
notes and updates

Nicole, Jacquie and Linda

LapBandGal (another band ROCKSTAR) and Betthan (has
to be said with Dawnya's accent btw)
taking pics of Maria and Jen

Itty bitty Lapband Gal and Betthan who
rocked outfit after outfit all weekend

Stephanie, me, Catherine, Nicole and Joey -
can you believe even ONE of us EVER had the words
morbidly obese written on a medical chart?!?!?

Tina, Catherine and Justine who flew in all the way
from England for BooBs 2.0!

Nicole and Joey

Joey: Gimme more lip
Nicole puckers up
Joey: Less lip
All taking place at the very packed karaoke bar

Angie, Stephanie, Sandy and Grace

So we left the karaoke bar because it was HEAVING
with people and a small group of us went to a very
bizarre nightclub to dance to 'bad 80's music' (hey, that was Maria's
sales pitch!) Angela, Barb and I left and were just steps away
from the hotel when Maria called Angela to let us know
Barb had picked up her handbag! Turns out Barb owns the same
bag! Did I mention it was FREEZING and our feet hurt?!?!

Angela gets us all sorted out and we ended
up hanging out in the hotel lobby
with Barb until the others made it back.

Betsy's pissed at me

Well if you dined with or near me last weekend in Chicago, you may have noticed I managed to leave Betsy my band at home. I wasn't out of control eating by a long shot, but definitely found myself able to eat much more than I usually can.
Including copious amounts of crack.... I mean garrett's Chicago mix!
I managed to come home just 1.5 lbs up. Normally a 5 day vacation in a food capital like chit an would guarantee a 10 lb gain!!
Well apparently Betsy wasn't happy about being let out and the bitch lives for pay back..... I've had a couple of pb episodes including the lunch I went out for upon arrival home.
I've barely been able to eat..... Not hungry and have that sense it's gonna come back up anyway!
Today my new dear colleague brought me a lindt choc bar that his wife brought back from Switzerland. And my almost sis in law brought me homemade coconut tartlets and an empanadas. Havent touched the chocolate, had a lick and bite of a tart and for dinner had the empanadas.....
Weight is about 1/2 lb off my lowest ever!

This band is a fickle lil bitch

A very special BOOBS pic. And they're NOT Barb's....

First of all, let me say that the glow stick lick and stuff in bra was perhaps one of the funniest moments of the entire weekend.
Second of all. I was NOT going to post this. I kept this one out of the mass photo blog last night and emailed it to Brandi for her own personal viewing pleasure and trip down memory (and Oh My God What Was I THINKING?!?) lane. And she emailed back saying 'oh my oh my, post away! lol! but thanks so much for checking first! '

I think 'Just a Wallflower' may just be THE most
misleading blog name EVER! Love ya girl!

Where to begin - BooBs part 1 of however many it takes to tell the story!

I had such an incredible time in Chicago that I'm not even sure where to begin!

Started out with four roomies and due to an unfortunate set of events, there ended up being just two of us and I must say, I hope you all took some time to get to know Stacey - she's lovely and SUCH an easy going roommate. AND she let me FORCE her into buying UGGS.... not because she NEEDED them, but because she WANTED them! Yay!!!!

Spent lots of free time with two spectacular ladies from Texas -- Fluffy and Angela are as amazing as I knew they'd be and then some. Honestly, at some point in the weekend as we were sharing yet another laugh and planning our outfits for the Disney Princess Half Marathon in late February (sweet Jesus how did I get myself into THIS one?!?!) it dawned on me that I'd only met these lovely women a couple days earlier, yet it felt in so many ways, that i'd known them (and loved them) forever!

I was the only one to get in Wednesday night so Thursday morning I ventured out to a RUNNING store and was fitted for shoes. Then did a bit more shopping before freshening up for the initial meet n greet.... Ended up running into the organisers in the hallway and helped lug all the stuff Lynne had driven up with. That truck bed was JAM packed with all sorts of goodness.

After meeting the first batch of lovely ladies, a crew of us headed out for a pizza (chicken wings for me) dinner. Thanks again Stephanie. I think you may just be one of the most generous women I've ever had the pleasure of knowing!

And then it was off to the Drag Show (I want her His body!!!!!) Loads of laughs even if most of the girls guys looked like they really wanted to be anywhere but on that stage!

I found myself falling asleep during the show but am sooooooo glad my fear of missing out on a single moment (you can sleep when ya dead) made me turn right instead of left and took me to the karaoke bar. First of all..... Angela can BELT! Well she could before she lost her voice and left it somewhere in Chicago. And Dawnya, Joey and Brandi had me in freakin hysterics! One of these days I'll learn to cut loose and just get up there and sing or dance like nobody's listening or watching even though I know perfectly well they are!
And Brandi - I know i solemnly promised to cut you off if you started dancing, but then how in the world would I have gotten to see the splits routine?!?!?!

And now for some pictures before I close this post.... to be continued

Donna, Jacquie and Kristin get acquainted

Krystal, Justine and Gilly. Justine was soooooo jet lagged and tired. Can't believe she came all the way over from the motherland!

Love, Love, Love this woman. Keeps it real every moment of every day. Mwwwwaaaah Dawnya

Waiting in the hotel lobby to go to the drag show

picking the RIGHT song!

Barb. And the girls.

Joey stepped up to help her get through the enotional ditty

Looks and SOUNDS like she was born with a mic in her hand!

I KNOW I'll get flack for this one, but she YELLED at me as I was taking it :)

Dawnya was feelin someone up throughout the weekend. Joey was the victim lucky girl this time!

At which point I was SUPPOSED to threaten the bartender with sudden death if he served her any more adult beverages..... oooops!

I hate how Blogspot always gets at least one pic out of order!

Ok - bedtime. More to come. I promise!!!!