How I'm Doing So Far

Thursday, December 30, 2010

New Year, New Me

It's hard to imagine right now that this time last year I wasn't even close to getting my shit together. In fact, my blog timeline tells me that it's ONLY been 6 months, one week and one day since I started the journey. Six months ago that my Dad encouraged me to consider getting a lap band. Heck. Six months ago I only vaguely knew what a lap band was and was barely aware that I'd crossed well over the line of being eligible for weightloss surgery.

I'm about 26lbs from my initial goal. It amuses me that people are shocked to realise that I could possibly have 26 more lbs to go before I'm in a healthy weight range. I am determined to not obsess over a number on a scale and instead, once i get into a healthy range, will focus on how i look and feel. I'm 186.6 today and looking damned good in size 10 pants and medium tops. Not too shabby at just 5 5 1/2 inches tall.

Just over a week ago I had a slight unfill because Betsy had tightened her grip to the point where I couldn't keep liquids down. Next Thursday I'm scheduled for a top up. As much as i hated sometimes the forced chew chew chew and tiny bites, I've missed having that the past few days.

I'm starting 2011 as a MUCH healthier and happier me than I was a year ago and for that, I am so thankful.

Christmas and unfill damage

so i was up 2.6lbs since last thursday. but i'm still rockin the size 10 pants so no biggie...

i certainly didn't consume 2.6lbs extra worth of food, but being away for the long holiday weekend, every meal was eaten out except christmas dinner and so there's lots of extra sodium n stuff. plus.... TMI warning.... I haven't pooped in DAYS...... usually coffee n benefiber get things flowing, but not this week. i'm sure there's 2.6lbs of poop waiting to be released.

ah well.... i am scheduled for a top up with my surgeon next thursday so will have to wade my way through what's turning out to be non-stop parties this weekend.... argh.... i can do this. i WILL do this. Just a heck of a lot easier when Betsy won't let a damned thing through the pipelines.


Wednesday, December 29, 2010

She did it again

She does it every single time. I'm talking about Betsy the Band. Everytime I begin to lament that perhaps I don't have enough restriction and need to get a fill (or i this case, a re-fill) she reminds me that she is indeed here and doing her job.
I grabbed a bag of potato chips on my way back to work just now and ate about 1/2 the bag. Until I realised I was stuck. Stuck enough that it wasn't going to go down and so into the bathroom I went and up came the chips. Barbeque if you were wondering. Ugh.
I did have a revelation that squatting at the toilet is strangely easier and more comfortable when wearing boots with heels. lol

Otherwise all's well. I brought in some soup for lunch. wondering if that's going to go down ok now that i've had a pb incident.

Still going to talk with Sam about getting a refill when I weigh in tomorrow morning. By my scales I'm up about a pound or a pound and a half.... not devastating by a long shot and compared to the damage i'd usually do over the holidays, it's pretty damned good. Still.... I'm hungry much sooner than i was before i had to have the unfill and i can definitely eat a lot more than i was able to..... we'll see.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Yes, Viriginia, There IS a Santa Claus

Because that's the only way I can explain the fact that today I bought, and am wearing size 10 pants! I went into TJ Maxx this afternoon and picked up a few pairs of pants and jeans in both sizes 10 and 8. Once again, I didn't bother trying them on because I'm a size 12... right?!?!?!

When I got home i tried on one pair of the 10s - they fit, but are too snug for prime time. But... two pairs of jeans and a pair of black slacks fit and look great!!!!

Best Christmas present EVER :)

I also picked up a few more size medium tops and even scored one that my mom bought without trying on and when she got home decided she didn't like it. i tried it on and she said since it looked good on me she'd MUCH rather i have it than she have to go back to the store to return it.

On the band band front.... post fill, Betsy is still doing her job. I flew on an early morning flight today so didn't have breakfast. On the plane i opted for the tiny 170-cal pack of cashews... managed to eat about  of them and had enough.

We didn't manage to get to eat lunch until about 1 and I ordered this lovely ahi tuna and avocado appetizer. I ate about a third of it plus about 5 pieces of edamame and realised I was satisfied. Burping now seems to be my body's signal to me to put down the fork.

I've been drinking a lot... I think my body's still trying to replenish what I lost earlier in the week when I was too tight. In any event, this feels good.

Merry Christmas eve my friends. Hope you all have a wonderful holiday!

Thursday, December 23, 2010


***weigh in update - Lost another 2.6lbs this week for a grand total of 77.8 in 6months 1week and 1day since starting the journey.  Holy shmokes. and my size 12 pants that i got two weeks ago are quite roomy. a few people told me yesterday that my pants are too big and it's time to get new ones!


Dr D is a rock star i tell you!

I called Sam and explained that Betsy had tightened her grip and wasn't letting go and she agreed that I couldn't keep going as I was (was worried for a second that she might think i was trying to get loosened up for Christmas). She got in touch with Dr D and I ended up meeting him inbetween cases at the hospital yesterday afternoon..
He took everything out to confirm that I still had 6cc and we put 5cc back in. I sat there for about 5 minutes drinking my water. I filled my big 24-oz tervis tumbler that morning and had only managed about 2 sips before the unfill and after i was loosened up a bit i was able to drink more than half of it right away. ahhhhhhh.... relief!

He gave me his cell phone and told me to call him anytime if there was a problem. Did I say already that he's a rock star?!?!

When I got home I had a half cup of Mom's pea soup and I chewed all the bits of potato beans ham and turkey really well and it all went down without the pains I've been having with eating of late. Relief.... I feel as if there's still some restriction because it was slow going.

Went to a staff party last night and drank lots more water and had about 4 or 5 chips with dip and 2 cookies and was good. I can tell that getting through the holidays there's going to be a lot more work on my part than on Betsy's but I'm up for the challenge.

Dr D says he wants to see me in about a month unless there are any problems. Since I HAVE to weigh in at his office every week we'll be monitoring my weight loss with 5cc and i'll closely monitor my consumption ability and hunger and see if we need to go up perhaps another 1/2cc to reach a sweet spot that's not to restrictive.

Am going for my official weigh in in about an hour and will update this post when I get back.

I'm headed to Florida in the morning to skip Christmas with my parents who leave this afternoon. Looking forward to a relaxed holiday weekend!

Merry Christmas to all who celebrate it and Happy Saturday to those who don't :)

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Scheduling an unfill

I just slimed and pb'd on my vanilla latte. that settles it.

I've been miserably tight and sore for  couple of days now. Anything I ate has hurt going down and not much has gone down before I felt stuck. Yesterday I was having a rough morning and water was a challenge. For some reason I decided I wanted McDonalds Chicken Nuggets for lunch. I've not had fast food of any sort for about 7-8 months so not sure where that came from. Anyway. I ate three of them very, very slowly and had a few french fries and was full beyond belief. On my way home I decided to eat two more (never mind that they were cold). When I got home I realised they weren't moving and I was sliming so into the bathroom and up they came. (I think that experience has put me off of Chicken nuggets for good). Last night I was struggling to get my cranberry juice down and after an entire evening of feeling horribly stuck and non-stop hica-burping, i started sliming and pb'd the cranberry juice.
So all I ate yesterday was three chicken nuggets and a few fries.
I've been getting headaches which I think are a result of dehydration.
This morning I had a sip of cold water and that didn't feel so great, so I headed to Starbucks for a latte.
As I said in my opening sentence, that didn't work out so well.
So at 9am I'm calling to see if Dr D can get me in today or tomorrow to take a wee bit out. I'm a bit nervous about opening things up, but I'm rational and know that this new level of tightness is NOT good for me at all.
I'm flying to Florida Friday morning for Christmas and even though it's a short flight and I didn't experience additional tightness as a result of flying a few weeks ago, I don't want to go over there and risk having major eating and drinking problems (as if it could get worse that pb'ing a freakin latte) while I'm away.

Sorry for all the moaning and groaning. Will leave you with a funny.

I made a personalised video for my 5-yo niece Isabel from Santa. We watched it last night and she loved it.

At the end, Santa says 'remember isabel, I'm counting on you.
Without skipping a beat she says 'and I'm counting on you, Santa.'

I thought we were all going to die of laughter!

Here's the link. If you have little ones, I highly recommend taking 5 minutes to do the video. It's free and it's priceless!

Monday, December 20, 2010

Cool giveaway

Do you know Eggface?

If you don't already follow her, you're missing out on some great meal ideas.

And.... now you're missing out on a chance to win one of her cool bento boxes.


edited - the link is above if you click on the word win -- but here it is again in case that doesn't work for everyone -

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Weigh in Day

Down another half pound this week..... a week when I was away Thursday through Monday! Love it!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Sometimes more is more

I'm talking about clothing.

It's rather chilly down here this week (no comments from you northerners... it's cold... i swear). Anyway, I'm wearing a turtleneck, the denim blazer i'm wearing in my last post, a pair of fitted but not tight jeans and my new suede boots. I am fully covered from tip to toe and still, i've been getting compliments from men and women all day long. one guy just told me i walk nicely. i chuckled because all i keep thinking is dear god please don't let me fall down in these heels!!!

It's been a really nice day full of nsvs and i wanted to share that even when we get thinner we don't have to dress in a revealing way to look hot :)

Monday, December 13, 2010

Incredible Shrinking Woman and pic

Holy cow.

I went shopping in Florida this weekend for the first time since starting my weight loss journey.

I bought a couple pairs of size 14 pants to get me through the holiday season and also bought a few pairs of size 12 pants because I found good deals on them. I didn't bother trying them on because I'm wearing 14's.

Well as i was packing last night I decided to try them on just to get an idea of how much longer before they fit. Lo and behold... I am a size frickin' 12! Three different pairs in three different styles, by three different designers in three different types of fabric. All size 12 and all FIT now!!!!

So instead of leaving them at the apartment in Florida until I'm back for Christmas in 2 weeks, I brought them home. In fact, I'm wearing one pair today!!!!

And on the top..... I was shocked to find that in most things I tried on, I'm a medium. wowzers. i'm the incredible shrinking woman.

So I guess when I head over in 2 weeks I'll have to start looking at 10's. To think that not too long ago I was bursting out of my size 20's.

It was SUCH a treat to go into dressing rooms and pick and choose whether I LIKED something and not just buy it because it actually fit and didn't look TOO hideous! I got some cool outfits and the only thing I couldn't find were long boots to fit over my still-monster calves!!!!

Eating wasn't bad over the weekend. Both friends I travelled with are two of my biggest supporters and were good about trying to find restaurants that would work for me. I was fine Thursday, Friday and Saturday and even though I didn't eat a lot.... it seemed it was more than usual and I began wondering if I'd soon need another fill. Well Sunday came and Betsy let me know in no uncertain terms that no fill is needed. We joined some girlfriends who live in S. Florida for a lovely brunch and I managed to eat the two poached eggs and a few little bits of lobster that came with my lobster eggs benedict..... and then we just had dinner. I had a few tortilla chips with amazing artichoke and spinach dip and got stuck like no one's business. It seemed to settle a while later and I managed a few sips of the soup part of my clam chowder and then a few bites of snow crab legs and mashed potatoes.... but nothing much.

Here's a pic of my friends and I at brunch. What I notice is that I look NORMAL!!! I look just like they do even if they are all a few sizes smaller... i don't look like the fat friend in the group!

Ok my lovelies - back to work!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

another big week

Down another 4lbs this week for a total loss so far of 74.8! Wow!

So glad I just sat tight during those weeks where I lost a single pound or nothing at all. Betsy is doing her job and i am doing mine.

It was about Monday night or Tuesday before I could eat properly after that stoooopid run-in with the dough. Now I'm back to normal, but still have tremendous restriction. One of these days I'll learn to take up only the food i can realistically expect to eat.... this morning i filled a container with rice and curried chicken and potatoes and even though it was nothing compared to what i'd have taken in for lunch pre-band.... it was wayyyyyyy too much food for me now.

i'm travelling for the first time since being filled to the brim later this afternoon. it's a short flight over to south florida so hoping the flight doesn't tighten me up any more.

i spent hours last night going through all my clothes and sorting out those that really don't fit any more. i have three pairs of pants that fit me now and none in the next size down so i'll be buying mainly 12's and 10's on this weekend getaway as well as a few things in my current size to get me through the holiday festivities.

it's going to be sooooooooooo weird not heading straight to Lane Bryant and Avenue on this trip!!! In fact, I'm really not sure where to go.... will figure it out quickly I'm sure.

Ciao ladies and have a fab weekend

Saturday, December 4, 2010

battle of the band

betsy is winning. I'm having a terrible band weekend and I have only myself to blame.

it all started Friday when I got some pea soup and dough for lunch. why I decided to try to see if the dough could go down is beside me. we don't have suet dumplings in our soups here.... no.... these are delicious, thick, gummy, can't be chewed for nothing discs of flour and water.
so as you can guess... I got stuck after a few bites.... very stuck. slime and pb stuck.
a half hour later, idiot me decides to try and force it down again. same results.
I was able to eat some curried chicken and rice that mom made for dinner..... verrrrrrrry slowly (I'm so hating eating cold food)
today i took my niece and nephew to the movies (tangled was fun!) and we had Wendy's for lunch. I had some of a cheese and bacon baked potato, and while it didn't get stuck, I could tell that betsy and my tummy are still mad at me for the whole dough episode..... dinner tonight was a super tender pot roast with steamed veggies and booked new potatoes... I got down a few bites and there was some slime action, but no pb and my insides have ben burning And sore (not relax-like burning though) ever since. I think tomorrow will be liquids only....

ugh and ouch

Friday, December 3, 2010

interesting lap band article

My surgeon and I were talking about this yesterday... I hope the FDA does approve lap band for a lower BMI..... I had the same food and weight-related problems at 230lbs as I did at 262.5lbs when I was eligible based on the 40 BMI.

Seventy Sounds Sweet

As of last night I'm officially down almost 71lbs. that's in 5 months, 2 weeks and 4 days. Wow.

I had a follow-up appointment with my surgeon yesterday evening and he's really happy with my weight loss progress. Even though it still feels slow to me, I'm just over 2lbs a week average since surgery and that's right where he wants me.

we agreed that there was no need for a fill. i have good restriction and am only hungry when i should be and satisfied with tiny portions. at least i know that when i feel it's time for a fill, i won't have to jump through any damned hoops to get one!

one thing i did tell him was that for the first time in my life i'm losing weight (even if it is slowly) without having to diet. I mean I am following the bandster rules of protein, small portions, chew chew chew, eat slowly, etc.... but i'm not denying myself anything and am really enjoying my food.
i've lost weight in the past, but it's always been through following diets that were really not sustainable for life... and the minute i eased up, the weight came back on. i know that this tool has broken that ugly cycle.